sobering thoughts

made a cake for a man that turned 45 today. maybe he never had someone make him a cake in his life. that's a sobering thought... what would my life be like if no one ever made me a cake for or celebrated my birthday?

neighborhood tragedies...

July 19, 2006- Man Dies After Shooting In Uptown/Shooting Also Wounded 17-Year-Old Boy

(STNG) CHICAGO A 22-year-old man has died after a shooting -- that also injured a 17-year-old -- that police say involved gang and drug activity early Monday in the Uptown neighborhood.Cedric Adams, of 128 W. 163rd St. in Calumet City, was pronounced dead at 2:15 p.m. Tuesday at Advocate Illinois Masonic Medical Center, according to a spokeswoman from the Cook County Medical Examiner s office.Adams and another victim, 17, were walking near 4423 N. Sheridan Rd. about 3:49 a.m. Monday, when they were shot by an offender who fled, according to police News Affairs Officer Kristina Schuler.The 17-year-old male was treated and released from a hospital after he had been shot in the arm, Schuler said.The shooting was believed to be gang- and drug-related, Schuler said.


July 16, 2006-Teen shot on Lakeview street

A 17-year-old boy was shot on a busy Lakeview street early Sunday.
The shooting happened about 4:30 a.m. at 1000 W. Belmont Ave., according to police News Affairs Officer Amina Greer.
The victim was shot in the abdomen, Greer said. He was listed in serious condition according to a preliminary police report, she added.
Police had no motive for the shooting as of 5:10 a.m. and no one was yet in custody, Greer added.

July 3, 2006- teen stabbed and killed

A 16-year-old boy was fatally stabbed near the location of Sunday morning's shooting.
The stabbing, which happened on the street at 938 W. Belmont Ave. about 1:45 a.m. on the 3rd took place when two men approached the victim and got into an argument about why he was standing on the street corner, according to police.
The three got into a fight and the 16-year-old was stabbed in the upper left chest area. After he was stabbed, the victim, Shawn Sparks, ran away and collapsed on the street at 958 W. Belmont Ave.

makeover

i'm pretty happy with how life's going right now. for the first time in a long time i know what it feels like to be content but not necessarily comfortable. of course, it's only in moments but those moments are looking a lot more like stretches these days.

i look back at some of my decisions from the past year and wonder why so much patience is made available to me. i look even now at some of my decisions and it seems that the grace doesn't run out but instead of that being an justification it is becoming a motivation.

that's nice.

ps. i have dreads. they itch.

i've got no clever title for this one, not like the other ones are very clever either.

it's been a couple of intense days and i've got a few brief statements/insights...

• there's this unique thing happening in my heart... the more hurt and difficult a guy gets that i'm working with, the more i love him and the more i want to pursue him (i never thought this would happen)-- i'm thinking it has a lot to do with jesus.
• christ is a lot more powerful than i understand and than i really know what to do with-- there's a lot about this battle not being against flesh and blood but "against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places" that i really don't comprehend.
• i think it hurts God when i act like i don't need his help. i wonder how he feels after i sincerely have a good day with him and turn around and blatently sin against him...
  i now know what it must feel like to want something for someone more than they want it for themselves.
• jesus is a lot more patient than i am.
• if i'm going to go any further in this type of ministry, i really need to know him more

charlie manson for president?

so i'm officially branded... that may come as a suprise to all of you but i finally went out and got a tatoo. and what an experience it was... i ended up going with the emmaus women... KT, Jessica, Nicole and Amy. four out of five of us ventured into this new land of permanence. KT got the Holy Spirit, jessica got the words from Micah 6:8 on her wrist, nicole was there for moral support and Amy got an "ancient" Chirstian symbol symbolizing ("in His service"). as for me, i got a hebrew word: מַצֵּבָה, it means (feminine) something stationed, i.e. a column or (memorial stone); a pillar. it is also found in the following verses: Gen 28:18, Gen 28:22, Gen 31:13, Gen 31:45, Gen 31:51, Gen 31:52, Gen 31:52, Gen 35:14, Gen 35:20, Isa 19:19, Exo 24:4.

the idea is that when something significant happened with the lord that people would put up a מַצֵּבָה (matstsebah) to show that it occured. when people passed these places on their journey, they would ask the question "what happened there?" it the NT, 1Peter 2:4-5 talks about" the living Stone—rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to him— you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ." my desire is to live my life in such a way that when people have encounters with me they will ask the question, "what happened there?" and that the answer would be, "Christ". i've wanted this tatoo for 2 years now and finally found out how to spell it.

as for the tatoo experience itself... i wanted to get it in brown (typical of me). two tatoo artists lectured me on how it wouldn't look good, how it would look like a "birthmark" i think they said. i didn't budge and got it in that color anyway. my artist was kindof bitter about this (she was also wearing a charlie manson for president t-shirt. hm). throughout the process she spoke about how she would "like to through the brown ink away so no one could ever get a brown tatoo again". i tried to start conversation with her and it didn't go very well. it went kindof like this:

"so, what is one of the most interesting places you gave someone a tatoo?"
"i don't want to answer that question," she said
"well, i mean appropriately," i said
"i still don't want to answer that question," she said.
"ok, nevermind." (look forward).

i've mentioned that i breed akwardness and this proves it she was nicer after i paid her. and she gave me a card for when it "looks like crap in a week" (because it's brown) and i want to get it fixed. i'm satisfied with it though and she did do a really good job even though the color brown is harder to work with. she's from utah too. that's all.