got a solid dollar?
i want so much to act but i know right now that i just need to observe and listen buti just don't want my observation to turn into inaction...
as the days go on i realize that the more i learn the more i don't understand. i know its cliche but its barebroken truth. i find that i'm a lot more naive than i thought i was and that reason that i'm not okay with that is probably due to pride. its not the good kind of naive either, you know the "oh, i didn't know that dirty word or name for something questionable or inappropriate". no. it's the bad kind of naive, that "you just took me for a ride as i gave you a solid dollar when you only gave me 70 cents" kind (which did happen tonight). its that "i thought i knew the answers for you" or even "i thought i knew the answers for myself". i am seeing that i have a lot less of the answers for either of those people and in thinking that i do have them-- i'm short changing myself.
i'm realizing too that i still possess that idea that i can come in a save you (whoever you is). i don't like that. working on change...
as the days go on i realize that the more i learn the more i don't understand. i know its cliche but its barebroken truth. i find that i'm a lot more naive than i thought i was and that reason that i'm not okay with that is probably due to pride. its not the good kind of naive either, you know the "oh, i didn't know that dirty word or name for something questionable or inappropriate". no. it's the bad kind of naive, that "you just took me for a ride as i gave you a solid dollar when you only gave me 70 cents" kind (which did happen tonight). its that "i thought i knew the answers for you" or even "i thought i knew the answers for myself". i am seeing that i have a lot less of the answers for either of those people and in thinking that i do have them-- i'm short changing myself.
i'm realizing too that i still possess that idea that i can come in a save you (whoever you is). i don't like that. working on change...
posted by ek at 2:30 AM
1 Comments:
i like your pic.
it's pretty evident how much god has changed you in the past month. and as much as i hate change, i'd definitely have to say this change seems to be a good one.
it was great to see you. hope to talk to you soon and gain some more insights into your life... and the inspiration for your songs...
i love you.
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